Family Chow Hall

What makes a good cook?

How do some people gain a reputation as a good (or bad) cook? Does burning toast early in a marriage doom you to a life as a bad cook?

(If you are looking for a recipe, scroll on down to my last post….)

I think there are several factors in making a person a success as a cook (or anything, for that matter.) I’m not listing this in any particular order, you decide which is most important. If you find yourself lacking in one area, it is easy to grow stronger in other areas.

1. Natural-born talent. Whether you’re talking about basketball, public speaking, making friends, or cooking… I think everyone has certain natural, God-given talents. Areas that they are strong in without putting forth a lot of effort. Not that they don’t have to practice and work to be excellent, it just seems to come easier to them than to others. As far as cooking, I think that the picky eater has an advantage here. Picky eaters have a higher sense of what is good and what is yucky. When they get in the kitchen, they don’t want to make what is yucky because they don’t want to eat it.

2. Attitude. If you are convinced that you are bad at something - skiing, painting, etc. - you will be. Our minds are more powerful than we give them credit for. If we have negative images in our head, we will reproduce them with our lives. If all you can picture yourself doing in the kitchen is burning toast, then it is highly likely that’s what will happen. Try watching cooking shows. They’re great for boosting your confidence and putting positive images in your brain.

3. Practice. All professionals practice. Ice skaters, lawyers, chefs. Success does not come when you fall to the ground and stay there. It comes when you pick yourself back up. When all else fails, try, try again. As Winston Churchill said, “Never give up!” Failure can be one of the best learning tools around. I mean, really, how many times in a row can a person burn toast? Eventually you will get it right.

4. Encouragement. You need a cheering section. Look at football - they’ve got cheerleader and bands urging them on. My husband and kids are great at this. Not only do they devour almost everything I make, they make light of small failures. We never give up and order pizza. My father-in-law, when presented with food that is not-quite-perfect, usually says, “Well, I guess I’ll just have to eat it,” and then cleans his plate. This may seem out of your control, but you can even be your own cheering section. Think to yourself, “Hooray! I did it!”

5. Good Company. Car salesman, dentists, parents hang out together. They trade secrets, they encourage each other. They share problems and help one another solve them. Surround yourself with people who are successful and some of it just may rub off.

If you ever think you’re a bad cook (or anything), work on a couple of these areas and watch yourself succeed!

In response to Steve Pavlina’s “How to Be a Man” post, I had to join in the fun and write my idea of a true woman. Steve Pavlina’s blog is one of my husband’s favorites to read and this post was a real winner, both fun and thought-provoking. I hope my thoughts on being a woman are almost as good!

How to Be a Real Woman

1. Make your own decisions. Form your own opinions about politics, family life, personal relationships, your faith, and more. A real woman doesn’t have to depend on her spouse, father, mother, friends, or anyone else to make her decisions for her. She is assured and intelligent enough to come to her own conclusions, but is also open enough to listen to and consider the opinions of others.

2. Know your priorities. Learn to tell the difference between what is merely urgent and what is truly important. A true woman can shift aside the meaningless to find what is meaningful and spend her time on the things in her life that matter the most. She understands that what’s important to other people isn’t always important to her and vice versa.

3. Learn to trust and be trusted by others. You don’t have to be in control all of the time and can relax and allow others to take charge. A real woman trusts her spouse to have her best interests at heart. At the same time, she is trustworthy and honest and the people who know her best trust her in every way.

4. Take care of yourself. Take care of yourself; mind, body, and soul. A real woman takes time out to exercise, do Bible study, meditate and/or pray, and educate herself. She knows and understands that doing these things is not selfish, but is essential to her well-being and is also for the benefit of those she shares her life with.

5. Give and receive love and affection gracefully. Never be embarrassed to ask for help, a back rub, a gift, or a favor. Neither should you hesitate to give the same; do both with joy, grace, and energy. Either way, both parties feel good and benefit from the giving.

6. Release your creativity. Everyone is given a certain amount of creativity. A true woman uses her creative energy in fun and productive ways, such as sewing or quilting, cooking, writing, painting, socializing, woodworking, etc. She is not afraid to share the results with her loved ones, acquaintances, or even strangers.

7. Don’t be afraid of hard work, sweating, or relaxing. Women no longer want to be pampered. They want and need to be productive and proud. They will not hesitate to apply liberal amounts of elbow grease and get sweaty and dirty. And, after working hard and accomplishing a goal, they want to reward themselves and enjoy the results before moving on to the next task.

8. Be beautiful. Look your best. This varies, of course, but a real woman looks her best. She doesn’t lie around in a bathrobe, even if she can. She does the best she can with what she’s been given – she gets dressed, maybe applies some make up, keeps an eye on the waistline and cares about her looks without being obsessed with them. She knows that when she looks her best, she feels good about herself.

9. A real woman doesn’t need diamonds, spa treatments, or French manicures to know her self-worth. She views them as wasteful, frivolous, useless, and meaningless. She would rather have a meaningful experience, such as a walk in the woods with her mate.

10. Submit without being a doormat. A real woman can set aside her own desires for someone else. She can serve her spouse happily because she wants to. At the same time, she doesn’t allow herself to be forced and manipulated into doing something she doesn’t want to do.

Comments? Email me at cheryl@familychowhall.com or clh@familychowhall.com

Being a home schooling mother of five, I visit our local library regularly. Actually, I visit it once a week, a scheduled visit which several of my kids would sorely miss if I skipped it. One likes to research animals and their behavior, one likes to read old-fashioned children’s stories and mysteries, one likes everything from comics to science books, the littlest one likes to rent movies. I usually pick something for my husband, who is an avid reader of all types of books, and I like to borrow some fiction for myself.

Many people don’t realize that the library also lends cookbooks. Yes, there is an entire section of your library — the shelves are stuffed full of cookbooks! Not sure you want to buy it? Borrow it first and spend a couple of weeks testing some of the recipes. Or, maybe a friend you want to have over for dinner is diabetic - borrow a diabetic cookbook for the occasion. Interested in food from other cultures? My library has an entire series of short cookbooks entitled, “Cooking the _________ Way.” I can pick from South American, German, Italian, Greek, or Japanese cuisine and more. You might decide to do International Food Day (or week) at your house. Want to make your kids some really special cookies on the last day of school? Choose a cookie cookbook from the shelf.

You can learn more about wine, cheese, beer, grains, meats, grilling, pastries, old-fashioned cooking, top picks from favorite magazines…. I could go on and on.

Last week, I had these cookbooks in my kitchen… “The Best of the Best,” a selection of recipes from the 25 best cookbooks of the year. I had “Best-Kept Secrets of Healthy Cooking,” there were some really tasty recipes in that one and I’m considering buying it. One was Pumpkin Gingerbread with very little oil, whole-wheat flour, and no eggs, which surprised me by turning out very well. I also had Better Homes and Gardens’ “The New Dieter’s Cookbook,” which had an abundance of delicious low-fat recipes.

If you are curious about a particular chef, check them out by borrowing one of their books. I spotted Emeril, Rachel Ray, and others on the shelf at my library.

And with electronic catalogs, finding books at your library is easier than ever. Most now have an online catalog, so you can search the topic or author, find the book you want, and copy the decimal code for easy finding at the library. You may even be able to place a hold on the book(s) you want and your librarian will have it ready for you when you arrive.

I know this post sounds like a commercial for your public library and I guess it is. I think that our libraries are a wonderful but sadly underused resource. In our materialistic society, we often buy and then discard. Personally, I almost always preview books at the library before I ever think about buying them.